the feeling when u played grooveshark and jack's mannequin songs stabbed you in the heart

well, I think my emo side has arise. I listen to grudge and rock bands again. these are the sign of how unstable my feelings right now. I don't want to be that pathetic girl, but I do. things are just scrambled and I dunno what to do. Things get complicated and by the end of the day, we'll realize that nothing left but regrets. My life is far from boring now, but happiness isn't come that easy. I am an open book with many footages, people may read me as plain and simple sentences or try to figure it out by skimming trough all references. But People said that a book is different for each person and they can choose whatever they want to interpret the journey. Guess I am the weird one, people may get confused once they saw me but I am easy to people I come along with. Right now... I feel like pulled by two different sources that give me very different tunes. The 1st tune is the happy, effective, and easy one. The 2nd one is the gloomy and weird one. I am weird inside. I do. But, I tried so hard to not to be that kind of person. But, how could I? I feel so lame already, I think I might wasted the rest of my life because of I fall short for everything that just actually so blur. I want to be rescued, but none can do except myself. I need to rescue myself. I know, I will. but...... I'd prefer cherished by bruised rather than rescued and found out that this thing was only my imagination of perfect dream. Yeah, only my perfect dream. Thanks Jack's Mannequin you guys made me realize I am the weird one.