i was so sad these previous days. i don't know what was making me so angry, until i said, i can't stand it anymore in my current relationship. i was too pissed off at that moment. i acted like a child. i knew that.

but then it wasnt totally wrong. it was true. there's no possibility to have a fair relationship in a condition like this. he was just too busy with his stuffs. he wasn't self centered kind of person, but then everything goes round and round him. that's why, it was hard to make him see me.

i was about to give up yesterday, i know i cant take it. i know i'll hurt more and more. i never become his priority. i cried.

but then, if am single, i also pissed off. no big difference.

so then, i choose to live my life. at least, my professional life is good. i mean, even my relationship is awful, my life stills good. with him or without him, i still continue my life.

if he is not mine, someday, me or him will leave.

if he is mine, slow but sure he will see me as me.

and am pretty sure, there will be a time, when he'll beg for me.

am pretty sure about that.