Chronicles of My Birthday

This is my 21st birthday and i was so happy today. so many surprises, so much happiness.

well, in Western Countries people who turned to 21 is allowed to do whatever they want to do. also in Indonesia, we allowed to buy alcohol and they won't kicked me out from club or casino. in 21, i know, i already mature. well, being mature is something tiring. yes, it'll be excited we can do anything we ever wish we could do when we were younger, and we'll be surprised by so many responsibility that followed.

like always, let me remind myself about past. there are so many things that i already passed. so many people come and go, not many people stay. when i was 12, i treated my best friends to cinemas, and it would be enough. when i was 13, i got crush, and i got 2 cassettes from Indonesian Band that i adore so much. i still remember, i got Ada Band "Metamorphosis" and "the best of Ada Band" from two different guy, one of them gave me a book of poem that i never read. i thrown it away to dustbin, i regret in now. how mean i were. When i was 14 i got Cow Doll as present from my ex, that was my first doll, and i keep it until now. I used to hug him a lot, now, i use it as pillow, i throw him every time i got mad, and i at times i sneeze on my Cow. well, i still love it. it was the first, that's all. When i was 15, the same ex bf gave me (if am not mistake) novels for my birthday, and of course a bunch of flower. red rose, for your noticed. i love red rose, and always love red roses. i start to know romance, and how romance could give me vibes, a dreamy-emotion side. and when i was 16 he gave me.... shit. i can't remember. shoes? dolls? ah! necklace! (i keep it until now, just because i don't know what to do with it). well, at my 17 i thrown a sleepover party at Novotel with my jhs best friends. they gave me present like always (well, actually they always give me, like wallet, dolls, photo frame, etc. it was lovely). also my ex gave me Z610 pink for my 17 birthday present. such a luxury for casual girl like me. i mean, i love the phone, but i never expect that much. the last birthday that i spend with the same ex, he gave me ring. a butterfly ring. yes i keep it. when i turn to 19, i had no boyfriend, but my (another) ex gave me a huge huge teddy bear, that was the biggest teddy i ever got. well, i keep the teddy, in fact i donate it to my youngest sister. when i was 20, i also didn't have boyfriend, but i already had L'amitie (my besties girls in collage), they thrown a surprise party for me. some of boys gave me like, photograph, Daniel Sahuleka limited edition DVDs, and another presents that i can't remember.

now am 21....

i thought, i wouldn't get that much. they told me that life is like ferris wheel, once you're on top, next time you're below. i thought, it'll be the time, when i got nothing in my birthday. i wish for nothing. i just said to myself, "even there's none celebrates my birthday, i will make it special!"

but, i was wrong. so many people fulfilled my birthday. my jhs best friends, my shs classmates, my collage friends, my boys friends. at 12 o'clock, my senior gave me a book that i like very much. America

i give you link for further info: http://www.bookfinder.com/author/jake-rajs/

he congratulated and conveyed the wishes at 12 o'clock, he gave me silverqueen also (what a surprise! :) ) and a creative simple birthday cake from McD cheese burger. at 9am in the morning the real cake were coming. Icang gave me black forest tart from Holland, and i like it so much. i always love black forest, he didn't know that. he just made it right.

at 3pm the surprise come,

they knocked my room, and tadaaaa.... they all coming. i was so happy. they gave me cake, and cracked an egg onto my head. they were 9 of them, sat on my sofa and we talked so many things.

at 5 pm, my best mate come to home, and gave me hijab. a veil. he said, someday i'll wear it. and that was so remarkable! for the 1st time i got veil for my birthday present. he even knows that i can't arrange it in the right order. then, the same best mate help me to pick up my mother from airport, she was from Jeddah, flown with Malaysian Airlines. and my mother gave me watch. the 2nd watch as birthday gift. the first was guess for my 19. then at 11.30 pm, another best friend of mine call me, he said, he wants to be the last person who said happy birthday to me. well, he was so sweet. i thought he forgot my birthday, actually he made it more deep by calling me and say that. well, yes, so much happiness like i told you.

but, don't you ever heard this words, "too much happiness makes you terrified"

am not that good, i mean, yes, i always celebrate my best friend birthday, and as much as i can i always taking care of others, but why these goodness happen to me? i feel, i'm not deserved it. so, like Icang said, it'll be sadness after happiness, and happiness after sadness. i had a fight with him tonight, my first fight in 21st. and one of my collage family passed away (a madam from the cafeteria's shop seller) , in my birthday. she used to close with me. i used to talk to her on her first days, i told her to prepare extra food on specific days, she remembers me as talk active girl who always paid food for week, like a prepaid system. she passed away, already. i was so sad. she passed away on my birthday, and this is so real. i mean, i can celebrate my birthday as big as i wish. i can tell to world, i'm the most happy girl on earth. but it wasn't real. death is real. it can be far, it can be near. we never know, how much longer our time. and i spend it, in fights. and i spend my time, in confusing which person should i give my loyalty. i waste my time, while truthfully, my time will be running out someday. it can be far, it can be near. so thank God, for these amazing 21 years, the happiness already born and shared. i hope for the rest time of mine in this world, i could give meanings to other. i could value myself, like a co-creator for society.

Phillip Kotler said, in this globalization, there will be awakening of creative community, that will push to help people living in sustain. to warn people, that life isn't just about living or staying, but maintaining, helping, sharing, and creating. i want to create something. why? simple, to leave a legacy in life.

"someday, we will be a memory. make sure, we will be a good memory for everyone"

how much time do we have?